We know why she's smiling. |
Sunday, June 23, 2013
Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire
Tuesday, June 11, 2013
The Real Problem With Marriage Equality
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Photo Credit |
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
A Vision Of Love
Kellie stepped out of the shower. I examined her naked body, smiled, and was about to pay her compliment when she cut me off.
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
Take Two Of These And Call Me Johnny Depp
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Photo Credit |
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Women Are Like Cars
Hey friends, it's been a busy few days and with Kellie and I leaving for Alaska in a few hours I'm not sure if I'll publish much next week. I decided to rerun one of my favorite posts, it was originally published in January 2012.
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Last Friday night, we attended a birthday party for our friend CJ, a young Marine who recently returned from Afghanistan. I whispered to Kellie, “You know, I think we’re the oldest couple here.” The youngest couple at the party, Rick and Lindsay, both in their twenties, were recently engaged. Having been married twice, once successfully, I felt that Rick might benefit from the wisdom of my years. I told him getting married was just like buying a car.
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www.fhm.com |
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Sexiest Nationalities
“Do I make you horny, baby? Do I? Do I make you randy?” If you’re a typical American female, you’re likely to answer yes to those questions from Austin Powers, at least according to a recent online survey that asked American men and women which nationalities were sexiest. U.S. females put Brits and Irishmen at the top their lists, while males preferred Latino women. I started thinking about how my preferences, as well as Kellie's, matched those in the study.
Saturday, May 11, 2013
The Malevolent Machine
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The Face of Evil |
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
Double Vision
I called central appointments hoping to see my doctor that afternoon, but after I told the nurse my symptoms she sent me straight to the hospital. It would not be an understatement if I said Kellie was very concerned about my condition – it would be a misstatement. This wasn't the first or second or even the tenth time she's had to drive me to the emergency room. She was more annoyed than worried.
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Losing My Religion
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Conflicted |
Friday, May 3, 2013
Charming Idiosyncrasies
During the initial stages of a budding romance, both parties are usually very well behaved, hiding those charming idiosyncrasies that might frighten away a potential mate. People do more than just control their endearing quirks, they also tend to suppress the basic bodily functions that make us part of the animal kingdom. We try to make believe that we don't urinate, defecate, menstruate, belch, burp or fart. But over time, maintaining the charade becomes burdensome and we eventually let our guard down. Kellie has decided to restore some of the mystique in our relationship by banning the fart. Since we can't eliminate flatulence, the new rule is: "Thou shall not release audible flatus in the presence of thy mate." She has also declared that the offender shall be punished with a pinch.
Once the law went into effect, we quickly discovered how much Kellie liked to blow her own horn. Whereas I bravely accepted my punishment, Kellie tried to escape her comeuppance by fleeing. This past week, my 15 year-old daughter caught us as I chased Kellie to administer her punishment. Turn up your volume and enjoy.
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